Do You Kill Your Dreams with Negative Self-Talk?

by Percival J. Meris on July 16, 2009

LISTEN TO YOURSELF WHEN YOU SPEAK. What words and vocal expressions come out of your mouth? How do you respond to questions and react to situations? Do they sound positive or negative?

A Case Study

You must have met some people who tell you their dark stories, even if you did not ask. Well, I had this friend who gave me a ride on the way home one rainy evening. In the car, he began his story about how much he hated his job.

The air inside the car was filling up with negative vibration that I wanted to stop him from going on. But what could I do? He was giving me a free ride. I wanted to alight from the car, but we were in the middle of nowhere in the vast expanse of a wet darkness.

So, I pretended to listen, being careful not to be affected by his negativities. Finally, I was able to summon the courage to interrupt, and said: “If your job is causing you so much stress, why don’t you resign?” He answered, “I would like to, but…”

An Experiment

After that, I decided to take on a little experiment on other people to test a theory cooking in my mind. For several days, I went around asking other people what they did for a living. I asked if their job allowed them to satisfy their passion. If their job was not their passion, then what was their real passion? Why were they not doing anything about it? They would reply, saying: “Oh, I would, but…”

There was always a “but” in their answers. Obviously, the word “but” in their statements was being used here as an excuse. How about you? Do you hear this word coming out of your mouth in this fashion?

Do You Use Negative Words?

Often, we repeatedly utter negative words in our conversations without being aware of it. We are experts at finding excuses for killing our dreams. “But” and other similar words are dream killers. We can achieve more if we would only bury this word and its relatives 20 feet under the ground.

The word “but”, as used in the manner of our example, is an excuse for procrastinators and for the weak of heart when it comes to achieving their dreams. It justifies their decisions for inaction.

Conquering Negative Self-Talk Habit

To conquer your habit of negative self-talk, daily positive self-talk affirmation must form part of your daily routine. The best part of the day to feed yourself with these affirmations is during the quiet peacefulness of the early morning. This does not preclude the use of these affirmations at idle times during the day.

If you cannot come up with one, you can use one of more of the 4500 self-talk affirmations in the ebook Self-Talk Secrets to Achieve Success Easily. Choose from among nine areas of interest: personal development, career, business, wealth, marketing, health, sports, management, and the spiritual.

Positive Let Us Be

Look for reasons to move forward and not excuses to idle through life. When you don’t move on life, life moves on you. Instead of giving reasons why you cannot, give yourself reason why you can, because, as Lanes Company said: “If you don’t make things happen, things will happen to you.”

Learn to monitor your language. By listening to yourself and changing the words and the voice you speak with, you can make a conscious effort to infuse a positive charge in your attitudes. Because you magnetize the air with positive vibes, people will begin to respond more eagerly to you.


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